feeling old

feeling old
this cinco de mayo
my mothers birthday
and day of neverending guilt
I went to the Richmond Art Center
today and there was this exhibit
of Latino art (in the small room)
and there was this drawing of a skeleton
with mermaid fins.
Somehow fish and death go together
on cino de mayo..maybe the skeleton
said something to my soul.
Came to Luggage Store this evening
the place is packed to the hilt with
"kids". I feel so old and incomplete and burdened.
Tonight I thought the guy in the burrito place
was going to take my $20 and not give me any change.
"I GAVE YOU A 20!!" I freaked.
Up the stairs, leaving behind a room full of vaugley frightened ears.
Between tears of remorse and anguish, "wow these kids are good".
Symphonic and thrashing at the same time.
More people here than ever came to see me play thus far...
all I can think is of that skeleton and that other piece
part of the "other" exhibit in the big room now...
the one called electric angel.
White on mysterious gold canvas.
"Electric Angel, light my way..."